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Showing posts from January, 2016

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #8-Bittersweet Love

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He’s always gonna be there for me but, he just doesn’t feel the same way about me anymore. I wish he hadn’t told me that. It’s almost like a one-way ticket for me to hold onto him.  I screwed up a lot of things in our marriage.  We were young and partying all of the time. Out of our social set, we were the most likely to do something with our lives. Drugs and alcohol were a past time to us but, not really a way of life.  One day, he came home and said that he was done using.

We started goin' to AA and NA meetings together.  Shortly after that, he enrolled in trade school to be a plumber.  I enrolled into a legal secretary certificate program and our lives really changed for the better.

We started working out together and cut out all of the junk food.  Things were going so great, he proposed to me and I just knew that we were gonna be together forever. I got pregnant a few mont…

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #7-Morning Patrol

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I knew the risks going into it. But, of course nothing really prepared me for the phone call and the in-person visit. I had so many questions. How did it happen? Was he alone? 

The kids are crying because they can sense my pain and sadness I struggled to hold it together.  This is not what I signed up for…alright maybe it is. But, he promised that he would be careful.

Why did he have to break that promise? 

I should have married that nice teacher. My mom warned me that being a Marine wife was not all rah-rah.  She should know. My  father was in the Marines for 20 years. I remember my mother glued to the 24/7 news stations with a bottle of Jim Beam clutched in her hands.

I swore to myself that I didn’t want that kind of life.

 So, I avoided military men at all costs. 

But, I ended up falling in love with one anyway.

 I fought it and to his credit Randy understood …

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #6-Go Away Cancer!

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I am 34 years old. I am not supposed to be going to chemo treatments on my lunch hour.   Lunch hours are for delicious meals, massages, mani-pedis, gossiping with girlfriends, or steamy interludes with significant others. But, as of late my lunch hours consist of chemo treatments. Trust me, it’s not as glamorous as it sounds.  
Lunch hour chemo is needles, IV lines, patronizing medical staff, and my bitterness neatly packed into a 60 minute session.
Of course, I am careful not to be too outwardly bitter in the clinic. I don’t want to poision others with my total resentment at being diagnosed with cancer at age 34.  I have tried meditating, reading good vibe laced books about  breast cancer not being the end of the road but, the beginning of a journey, crying jags, and asking God why he chose to inflict this onto me.
I remind God on a daily basis of my long list of good deeds an…

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #5-I am Gonna Be A Star!

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I came out here via Greyhound bus. Typical small town girl,big dreams stuff. You’ve heard the story a million times. I am a walking cliché in this town.  The star hometown thespian heads to Hollywood to pursue her dreams of fame and fortune.  
  I made a deal with my parents that I would at least finish my four year degree before venturing out here. The streets here are filled with Ivy-League degreed women from better family trees than mine and of course way more financial reserves. These chicks can afford to party with the rich and famous. Thusly enabling them to gain entre into some starlet’s entourage. These days even being a bit player in a C list celebrity’s entourage can get you a reality show deal on some random cable network.
Well,my parents are both small town high school teacher which isn’t impressive enough to get me access to a D list entourage. Oh well.   I…

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #4 -Hell is Other Women

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Tomorrow is my last day here in this hellhole. Okay, perhaps hellhole is too strong of a term.  The job itself is great. I get to research  land  titles of houses in the town’s historical district.  Each house has a story.

 Sometimes the story is filled with romance with just a dash of magic. Other times, it’s filled with tragedy and vanquished hopes.  To the outside observer, a house is just bricks and mortar with a few decorative flourishes thrown in for good measure. But, I know better.  I take my work very seriously.  I refer to my abstracts as historical novellas.

Potential donors make their decision to contribute based upon one of my colorfully written abstracts. This drives my co-workers crazy.  I work in an office of all women.  You would not believe the high levels of cattiness which I have put up with on a daily basis.

My co-workers make a huge deal of …

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #3-Patch of Dandelions

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It’s a sunny May morning and surprisingly the wind is almost non-existent. Usually, the May breezes in Western Kansas can be unrelenting. This is the main reason why a majority of events around here are held indoors.  

Today,  however there is no wind. It is the perfect day for an outdoor gathering. We don’t get many of those at all ‘round here. I can see Jacob pulling up into the parking lot. Kari is four and Mario is six. I want  so badly to run up and comfort them but, that my be kinda awkward for them since I am dead and all. Yeah, you heard me.

  I am dead. I died a few days ago. I was involved in a car accident with a Judge Donnelly. He’s known for being a world-class drunk river. He broadsided me while I was on my way home from Bible study. I should have taken the long way home on route 12 but, I was in a hurry.  I wonder  whether the kids are feeling better. Kari looks so frail and Mario doesn’t look lik…

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #2- She Just Had To Up And Change

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Things were going well with us… until she went and changed on me. My best friend of over 20 years decides one day to go and lose 150 pounds.

 I mean, really? What the hell?!?

Meanwhile, I am scrambling around trying to figure out how the dynamic could  change between us so quickly. Now, she’s the one barking out orders and extending invitations to the local hotspots.

‘Course livin’ in Great Hills, Kansas our nightlife is kinda limited but, somehow she’s managed to get VIP seating at the bingo lounge. I mean you really have to get in good with the right folks to get that honor.

 Anyway, she thinks she’s so skinny cuz she’s a size 12 now. Big whoopty do! For years, I was a perfect size 16 and she could barely zip up a size 22. Now, all the sudden she’s the Queen of Sheba cuz she can wear skinny jeans.

Whatever.

Now, I don’t want y’all thinkin’ that I am a jealous shrew. Let me assure that it is not the case. But,…