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Showing posts from March, 2014

Bougie Girl Apparel: Egg Shell Walker

Egg Shell Walker by Bougie Girl Apparel

Honesty in relationships is a must for most of us. However, there are a determined few whom insist that their significant others walk on eggshells around them. They hand out demerits each time their significant other dares to infuse a bit of reality into  a conversation. No one begins a relationship with a goal of constantly walking on eggshells. 

Bougie Girl Apparel: Envy Stirrer

Envy Stirrer by Bougie Girl Apparel

I stir up envy within those around me. You yearn for my perfect body, loving spouse, awesome kids, and powerhouse career. You subscribe to my blogs and podcasts hoping to emulate me in some way.  What if I told you that my "amazing" life is really comprised of clever word choices and well-placed phrases? Those stunning scenic photos which I snap on my family vacations are taken when the kids are off watching movies on their tablets and my husband is texting his not-so-secret mistress.
Of course, you only see the surface version of my life...and that's way it supposed to be.

Divatosity Food: Broke A** Chili Mac

It's a day or two before pay day and you are down to the last few dollars. Perhaps, you have money in savings but, you want to use it as a last resort.

You discover that you have a can of chili and some frozen mac and cheese. Well, you could eat these items as separate meals or you could join them together for the ultimate in comfort food deliciousness.

Cook the chili on the stove per the directions on the can. Next, throw the frozen mac and cheese in the microwave per the instructions on the package.

Add in cracked black pepper and you have some yummy comfort food. If you want to get super fancy, add in some  chopped sauteed onions and mushrooms.

A cold blustery day is no match for this super cheap comfort food.

Real Men...(insert unrealistic expectation here)

Real Women...(insert disempowering and divisive slogan here)

Slow Dance

The music has not yet started. You are both standing on the dance floor.  A wall of silence separates you. The first chords of the music is played and instinctively, you reach out for one another. The dance is awkward at first. Both of you are struggling to figure out how to successfully manuever around the floor. In fact, it takes at least a few bars of the song until you stop tripping over one another. Other couples may unwittingly bump into you or insist on cutting in. I advise you against the temptation of letting others cut into your dance. To do so, will rob your dance of its sacredness.

Loving What's There...

Loving what's there isn't easy. It requires us to see things for how they really are and not how we want them to be.

 Falling in love with possibility is much easier. We can craft a fantastic love story in our head and then bolt when the reality does not match our fantasy. Sometimes, it takes a heartbreak or two before we stop this destructive behavior. Let's face it,  the decision to love in a mature fashion is not a natural reflex for most of us.

Veils Of Privacy

During our 20's, we chatted a lot about our relationships. We brought our friends and family into the relationship circle with us without nary thought to the importance of privacy.  We seemed to need the world to view us as part of something grander than a singleton.

Coupledom is what we sought out and many times we found ourselves disappointed by our significant other or the relationship in general.

It wasn't until our 30's that we learned not to share every detail of our relationship. Maturity was a big reason why but, mostly we are embarrassed by the less than perfect reality of our relationship.

As we move into our 40's and beyond, we stay mum about our relationship because we want to keep things private. Not for the purposes of pretending to be perfect but, as a way to respect what should stay private.

Growing Into Our Blessings

Growing into our blessings can take awhile. Sometimes, we do not recognize the blessings being placed in front of us. Blessings come to us starkly unadorned without expectations and or directions on how to best use them.

We stumble around trying to adjust our blessings into our current lifestyles. Alas, blessings don't always travel well. We can't always bring them with us into every situation. Some of them are fleeting and not meant to be forever.