I Am The Exception...And I Am Sorry by Bougie Girl Apparel
I am the exception. I made him realize that he needed to change his bad boy ways. I outlasted all of his friends with benefits situations, side girls, killing time girlfriends, and one night stands. Somewhere, they are all begrudging the fact that he did end up settling down with me aka the "woman of his dreams".
Unfortunately, our fairytale existence ended a few months after he carried me over the threshold.
Dealing with his daily BS and whiny demands is enough to make me long for the bad boy whom he used to be. Now, I am stuck with a domesticated whiner who calls me 5 times a day at work, badgers me into discussing our relationship 24/7, and constantly hacks into my Facebook account.
Salve of Self-Righteousness by Bougie Girl Apparel
I am better than everyone. Now, I know that a humble spirited woman such as myself should never say it aloud. Yet, the truth of my innate goodness shall find its way into the world. This is what I am telling myself every day. The knowledge of my moral superiority brings me great comfort. It is a salve of sorts.
Show Me How To Stay... by Bougie Girl Apparel
I know how to charm just about any woman into a relationship. A few well placed complimentary words and a gentle squeeze of her hand and BAM she's mine. But, a few months later I find that the very sight of her annoys me. Don't get me wrong, these ladies are great but, I haven't found the one to make me stay.
Have you ever been so close to having everything but, your fear prevented you from taking the final necessary steps?
Yeah, me too.
The world sees me as this confident well put together man. Yet, whenever I am around her my air of confidence completely disappears into the vapor. I am struggling to find words to tell her how I feel.
How do you tell a woman that you've been holding a torch for her over a period of at least five years without looking like a stalkerish creep? Once, I was seated next to her at dinner party and I could barely speak to her. In fact, I was rather cold towards her. She took my chilly attitude in stride and chatted up the rest of the table making everyone feeling welcome.
Sometimes, I wonder if I truly love her. Perhaps, I just love the fact she is unattainable to me.
Back in July, I bid Newport, RI adieu. I said goodbye to the charming apartment which was adjacent to the downtown Newport. I miss the hustle and bustle of the tourists, the long leisurely lunches which turned into nights out on the town, the salt air, and watching the ocean crash against the cliffs.
Life in Kansas is a bit different. It's less about magic and all about sturdiness. Yet, sturdiness is the necessary framework for this latest chapter of my life.