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Thursday, December 31, 2015

Ten Monologues For Women: Monologue #1- Personal Revolution

I didn’t learn my lesson until I was almost 30 years old. You know, the lesson about crappy occurrences turning out to be blessings in the end. Yeah, that lesson. The lesson which every Grandma tries to instill in  their grandchildren over cookies and warm milk…that is if you had that kind of  Grandma. (Pause)

And I definitely didn’t.  My Grandma had a lot of problems almost of them were  gin-related if ya, know what I mean.

So, there was this guy.

And it’s funny cuz, these lessons always seem to revolve around a guy.  This guy was my college sweetheart. Mr. Wonderful himself. Only he wasn’t so wonderful. But, I didn’t find that out til much later.

I got a scholarship to go to Brown University. See, my gin-soaked Grandma came from a very wealthy family and she had connections.  It also didn’t  hurt that I was a 4.0 student and star forward of my basketball team.

Anyhow, I meet Allan aka Mr. Wonderful, my first week of classes in our freshman year. What can I say? The guy was definitely a charmer. Apparently, he had “charmed” half the girls from my dormitory floor out of their clothes.  Of course, I didn’t know any of that. Allan targeted me because I was inexperienced when it came to dating. 

He must have figured that it was to his advantage to lock me down during freshman year. In hindsight, I played the role of the respectable coed. My main function was  to accompany Allan  to fraternity parties and family events to maintain the illusion of his charmed lifestyle. 

Sadly, I actually thought that Allan was my soul mate. I pictured us together forever. Whenever we were in the same room together…no one else existed for me. Alas, that wasn’t the case for Allan. I had no idea about his predilection for trashy women until our joint  college graduation party when some random pregnant chick crashed the party.

Apparently, Allan had messed with the wrong “trashy” woman. This one was actually halfway smart and she had ambitions of becoming a part of his hoity-toity family. Needless to say, his parents coerced Allan into marrying me and then we would pay off the mistress and “adopt” his baby. It was sickening. I wanted no part of it.

But, his family had dirt on my Grandma’s propensity to run into inanimate objects after one of her “gin” fiestas.  It was either marry a womanizer or watch my Grandma’s reputation get shredded.

So, I married him and his womanizing became even worse.  However, I did manage to bond with his little girl Madeline.  She is a little angel and her mother isn’t the worst person in the world. Although, she still harbors hopes that Allan will some day marry her.

Um, can we say delusional?

Fortunately, I was able to cut a deal with his parents to only stay married to him for 7 years.  They also wanted me to produce an heir of more respectable parentage than Madeline. I only agreed to do that after a physician of my choosing ran tests on Allan and determined that he was STD free.

I gave birth to our son, Dylan last year and I am counting the days until I can file for divorce.  I only have about 3 months left in my marriage. I am going to take custody of both Madeline and Dylan.  My relationship with Allan is crappy no doubt about it.

 Yet, I have two little angels that make the hell in which I went through worth it.

And Grandma?

I made Allan’s parents hire a lifetime personal driver for her on their dime.

Friday, December 25, 2015

Ten Monologues For Women: Introduction

My love for writing monologues began at the tender age of fourteen. This latest blog series centers around monologues written for women. They encompass women from all walks of life. Some of them are long and others are just a few paragraphs. (Feel free to use but, credit please.)

Thursday, December 24, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport-Chapter 21: Returning To My Homeport (Conclusion)

(July 2012)

I am scheduled to move in a couple of days. The last of my Navy family shipped out last week. I miss the terribly but, social media keeps us updated on one another's lives. Although, it is still not the same as being able to meet them for Happy Hour or a last minute potluck party.

My local crew is helping me to find good homes for random household and clothing items. My church was delighted to receive several boxes of donations from me for the annual yard sale which occurred earlier this summer. The apartment is virtually empty. All of the furniture has been sold or given away.

The infamous air mattress is the only thing left in my bedroom. It is still as uncomfortable as I remember. I wonder how the Sailor and I managed to sleep on it for a month during an historic heatwave without killing one another.

The Sailor shipped out of Newport earlier this year. During the time after our breakup, we kept in frequent and then more sporadic contact. There was so much sadness on both sides of the equation that it was best to limit our contact.

The bond between us will always be strong but, we are better as platonic friends than life partners.

Though our plans of matrimony did not come to fruition, we will always have the memories of the crazy heatwave, cooking adventures, kite flying, long philosophical discussions, and of course Newport, Rhode Island.

In the Sailor's absence, I rebuilt my life from top to bottom in an unfamiliar place far from a majority of my friends and family. People will leave your life and it is sad when they go. But, new people are always around the corner. We just have to be willing to let them into our lives.

Newport, Rhode Island will always hold a special place in my heart. I will miss my Navy family and my local crew. Yet, a part of me is looking forward to the adventures that await me in Kansas.

Though more than likely said adventures in Kansas will not involve strolling on a beach, eating freshly caught seafood, trying to decipher New Englandese, and/or watching the ships come into the harbor.

The End

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport: Chapter 20-Shipping Out

(March 2012 to June 2012)

In a matter of months, the rest of my Navy family will be shipping out to various parts of the world. They all seem to be in agreement that it is time for me to head out to a different port.

I briefly consider relocating to Washington DC or even Richmond, Virginia. I have friends and family in both places. But, now things are a little more complicated due to my father's unexpected passing and the inheritance of a farmhouse and several acres located in Kansas.

It is becoming too expensive to maintain the farmhouse and property from Rhode Island. I can only imagine the financial struggles headed my way if I stay on the East Coast.

Finances and maturity are steering me back towards Kansas. Goodbye to lazy days strolling the Cliff Walks, taking photos of various piers and docks, fresh seafood, and the endearing New England accent.

The land of no oceans, no mountains, and lots of prairie for miles around. 

Sunday, December 13, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport: Chapter 19-Gathering Up A Local Crew

(September 2011 to February 2012)

Being a part of a Navy family is both familiar and comforting. However, as with any active duty military personnel, they are always on the move. Many of the Navy folks here are on shore duty and/or attending the War College. In other words, they are rarely here for more than a year or two before it is time for them to transfer elsewhere. Sometimes, their tenure here is less than six months.

In the past few months, I have both said goodbye and welcomed more than a few Navy friends. This inspires me to cast my social nets in a wider space. Currently, I work for a local corporation headquartered a few towns away. I work with a lot of younger folks and their energy is contagious. I find myself attending more and more Happy Hours after work, being invited to dinner parties hosted by  co-workers, and I have even joined my company's bowling league.

It is hard to believe that within the span of seven months that my life could turn around for the better. Before moving to New England, I was nervous about making civilian friends. New England is not known for rolling out the welcome mat for new arrivals.

Yet, I found that the opposite is true. The local people have been so kind to me. At least a few times a month, I stroll into downtown Newport to meet a friend whom has driven over from Warwick or even Providence. We grab a quick lunch and then stroll down the charming streets talking about our future dreams and wondering aloud where life will take us next.

A few times, I have  rely on my local crew to help me with unexpected car repairs. Once, I had to stay late after work and my back passenger's side tire was completely flat. Within about fifteen minutes, the guys from the warehouse had jacked up my car and put air in my spare tire.

Another time, my driver's side mirror was dangling from its wire and within an hour they had it back together. I feel extremely blessed to have an awesome local crew.

Thursday, December 10, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport: Chapter 18- The Grand Re-opening Of The Mess Hall

(February 2011-November 2011)

Since breaking up with the Sailor, my forays into the kitchen are not filled with much joy.
Cooking has become a hassle and another painful reminder of my failed relationship.

However, my recent membership into the local social group has changed all that. Roughly 85% of the members are in the Navy and all of them have a pretty healthy appetite.

Once again my kitchen has become a busy hub of activity. It feels good to have people to cook for again. I spend an hour a day researching ingredients and marking up my trusty cook's notebook.

Our almost weekly potlucks consist of good food, excellent wine, and lots of conversations. Sometimes, we spin tales of our previous lives.  I share stories about my early days of getting lost in Newport and the magic of flying kites in Brenton Park.

In turn, the Sailors regale me with tales about navigating life in a foreign country. The gist of their stories usually contain a pebble of wisdom about thriving after the unexpected shows up in your life.

The past several months have been a study in the unexpected showing up and setting up camp in my life. Yet, I am learning that there are two sides to the unexpected. It can remove one person from your life and bring in several others within a short span of time.

I am surrounded by a group of new friends and though their are still pangs of "what could have been" regarding the Sailor. Somehow, I know that I am right where I am supposed to be.

Sunday, December 6, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport:Intermission

The latest installment of this series is not quite finished. So, I have decided to let it percolate for another day or so.

Friday, December 4, 2015

We'll Always Have Newport: Chapter 17-Sailing Into New Waters

(February 2011)

The Super Bowl is on and I am standing in a kitchen full of people whom I have never met before. It is my first night as a member of this 20-30 something meetup group which I technically am a couple of years past their cut off age.

However, after explaining my situation to the group organizers, they usher me in with hugs and sympathetic words. A couple of them are Naval officers and they have seen just about everything during their time in the military.

The general consensus of the group is that relationships and the military don't always go hand in hand. Of course, I knew this but hearing from folks in the military lightens my heart.

I spend hours chatting with several people about life in New England versus the Midwest. One of my fellow party-goers hails from the Midwest as well. We hit it off instantly and joke with another as though we have known each other all of our lives.

I leave the party feeling ecstatic and looking forward to spending more time with these new acquaintances. 

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