Next Stop..Single Motherhood by Bougie Girl Apparel
A few weeks ago, I made the life-changing decision to become a single mom. Previously, I had bandied the idea about half-seriously/half-jokingly. Losing both a pregnancy and my father last year, made me realize just how much I wanted to be mother.
Yet, the traditional route of getting married and starting a family seemed not to be in the cards for me. I could complain about the dearth of eligible men out here in the dating world and constantly dwell on my past relationship failures...or I could turn my focus to fulfilling my life-long dream of being a mother and leave the rest behind.
I came to this decision for the following reasons:
- I don't want to put a lot pressure on a potential suitor to propose after the first date.
- I don't want to convince/coerce a man into having a child with me because of my biological clock.
Instead, I am choosing to go the sperm bank route. I am what the OB/GYN community refers to as a woman of advanced maternal age and I also have a history of prior miscarriages. Meaning, that I might not be able to sustain a healthy pregnancy at all.
If that's the case, I am headed to the county to become a foster mom with the intention of eventual adoption.
Will this path be easy?
Parenthood is difficult even when you have two healthy partners raising a child. I am fully aware that this journey into single motherhood is not going to be a walk in the park. My parents divorced when I was in elementary school and I saw first-hand the difficulty of being a single mom.
Luckily, my mother had a great support system which enabled her to make it work .In addition, we remained close with my father and his family. My childhood wasn't perfect but, overall I was surrounded by solid adult role models.
My child to be will be blessed with a village of solid adult role models.
Bottom line, I am done waiting around for a man to "choose" me so that I can go onto the next chapter of my life. It's time for me to do the choosing.
I am choosing single motherhood.